A wrathful man stirs up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeases strife.
There are certain people who are peacemakers, and there are others who are peace breakers. Those characterized by peace breaking are toxic to families and churches. Generally, you will find the dead bodies of broken relationships in their wake. Not all peace breakers are given to anger, but all angry people will stir up strife. A person who has an occasional bout of sinful anger should not be characterized as an angry man. The angry man is one who habitually responds to problems with anger. He relies on his anger to get things done. The home, the church, or the business seems to be far more peaceful in his absence. This fellow seems to be in the middle of every conflict that arises. Since such men are so dangerous to the fellowship of the local church, the Apostle would have us waste no time rejecting such a one after two admonitions (Titus 3:10).
On the other hand, the person you really want to have as part of your assembly is the subject of the second half of the verse. He is a consummate peacemaker! Instead of contributing to the conflict, he will work to resolve disagreements. He is not afraid to address multitudinous conflicts and disagreeable conversations, saving the church from a hundred potential splits. These men are immeasurably valuable to the health of the church body. Here the peacemaker is defined as one who is “slow to anger.” He is patient, self-controlled, and careful in his words. When the temptation to “fight” or “flight” arises, he does not act in sinful anger and fear. His response is measured and motivated by passionate love for God and a trembling fear of God.
The way of the slothful man is as an hedge of thorns: but the way of the righteous is made plain.
As a book intended for the education of a young man, Proverbs addresses the sins most prevalent among boys, including the sin of slothfulness. Should this sin be allowed free rein in the life of a young boy, the spirit of slothfulness may settle upon him such that he is eventually characterized by it. What a curse upon a family to have a slothful man for a father! It is such a severe sin that the Apostle Paul counts as unbelievers those who will not work to provide for their own (1 Tim. 5:8, 2 Thess. 3:7–10). In other words, such men should be expelled or excommunicated from the church.
Once a man is overcome by the spirit of slothfulness, work becomes uncomfortable, even intolerable to him. Every time he addresses himself to the slightest task, it is like crawling through a hedge of thorny bushes. Have you ever experienced the discomfort of crawling through multiple layers of barbed wire fence? It certainly isn’t anything you would look forward to. This is how the slothful man views things like making his bed, weeding the garden, changing the oil in the car, or cutting up firewood. His attitude towards work is so bad, every effort required of him becomes a torturous ordeal. From such illustrations, you will realize the terrible, evil nature of this spirit of slothfulness!
The slothful man cannot be counted among the righteous, because no true man of faith is under the bondage of such sins. In contrast to the slothful man whose every step is an intolerable drag, the way of the righteous man is made plain. This is not to say that he does not face his own thorny trials, inconveniences, and obstacles in life. But they are manageable. With each step he takes in the breathtaking challenges of his life, he finds the grace to make it through. Others watch in amazement as they see his family willingly adopt a special needs child with multiple medical problems. The family didn’t know how they would make it, but afterwards they said with a smile, “God’s grace was sufficient for us, and you know, it really wasn’t all that bad! In fact, the whole experience was a wonderful blessing for our family!” The way of the righteous is made plain.
A wise son makes a glad father: but a foolish man despises his mother.
A wise son is one who honors his mother. There is probably nothing more distressing to a godly father than to see his sixteen year old son despising his mother with sarcastic remarks and disrespectful facial expressions. What son would wish to disappoint his father and despise his mother? Only an arrogant fool would destroy the closest and most important relationships in his life. Yet the temptations towards such foolishness work strongly in the hearts of young men today. May God deliver us from such ungrateful, wicked behavior!
When a father invests thousands of hours of teaching and training into his son over a period of eighteen to twenty years, how might that son reward his father? What could he give his father that might be appropriate for such sacrifice? There is only one thing that any godly father would desire from his son, and that is wisdom. The blessings of wealth, fame, worldly success, and academic prowess all pale in comparison to the blessing of a wise son who fears God and seeks the priorities of His Kingdom over all things.
1. Are there peacemakers or peace breakers in our family? How would others characterize us?
2. What is your perspective of work? Do you find even minor tasks a heavy burden? Or do you find work an enjoyable and natural part of life?
3. How do our children treat their mother? Does it become more difficult to honor your mother as you move into your teenage years?